Conglomeration of Indians News channels today made official what we have not been witnessing for months- their election coverage will not involve scrutiny of core issues such as unemployement, poverty, farmer suicides, crumbling infrastructure, pollution and continued domination of North Eastern states in Indian Idol. "Quite like the ruling party, we have demonstrated in the last five years, our ability to bring out issues to the table, by means of expert panel discussions, biased debates,bootlicking preferred leaders, reality shows and cookery programmes,", said a senior producer for an English news channel (The name shall remain anonymous since we in the media brotherhood won't tell on each other.)
"According to our Defense Minister, there has been growth even when the world is facing recession; inflation is close to 0%. Furthermore, strong public reaction against Western potrayal of poverty in Slumdog Millionaire proves that poverty is over. And as farmer loans have been waived, they no longer have a reason to commit suicide.Therefore we have nothing left to report expect for mathematically derived seat-sharing agreements and alliances made outside of shaadi.com. We are mixing Web 2.0 technologies, modern soap opera idioms and reality show drama. Why even the Third Front is waiting for our audience SMS poll results to decide the PM Candidate!"
In other news, pundits in Itchalkaranji district of Maharashtra are praying for Barack Obama to solve the World Economic crisis and stop the channels from endlessly airing the same Varun Gandhi speech from different camera angles.
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